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Managing An Out Of Control Teen

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I have two teenagers – an almost 16 year old daughter and a 13 year old son. They have the typical teenager attitudes, rebellions and my daughter is a major “drama queen”, but at least their behaviors are not out of the norm. Sometimes teenagers take it to the extreme and end up being out of control and overly rebellious.

Here is a guest post that offers some suggestions on how to manage an out of control teen.

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The teenage years can be traumatizing on both teens and their parents. Between peer pressure, power struggles with parents and rebellion in school, parents can easily become frustrated when dealing with their teens. Learning how to manage teens is an exercise in extreme patience, and many parents struggle with getting a handle on their out of control teens.

Set Boundaries

Teens need structure in their lives. Many of them try to test boundaries by refusing to go to school, breaking curfew and getting into trouble. Teens often become rebellious because they think adult rules are stupid, senseless and unfair. They often don’t see the point of working hard in school, and fight against parental rules.

The key to managing teens at this stage is to set clear boundaries and rules. Stick to your convictions and don’t make exceptions. Let them know that it’s okay if they don’t like school, but they still have to go. Teens at this stage don’t have a clear ability to forecast and predict the future. They often live in the “here and now,” and don’t understand the impact of their behavior on their future lives. By giving them clear rules, you set the bar and let them know what is expected of them. Teens need and crave structure, and by creating boundaries, you will empower them to make better life choices.

Focus on the Behavior, Not the Attitude

Teens often act out as a means of expressing their emotions. It can be hard for them to vocalize certain things at this age, so acting out behavior can be a symptom of a larger problem. Instead of admonishing them for being angry, moody or irritable, focus on what behavior you want them to exhibit. Let them know that it is okay for them to be angry, but not okay to act out violently. Websites like HelpYourTeenNow.com will give you some talking points that you can use to get the conversation flowing with your teen.

Stop Problems Before They Get Out of Hand

If you suspect your teen is using drugs or drinking, you are probably right. As soon as you notice a problem, address it. Don’t let things spiral out of control. Know who your teen’s friends are, what his schedule is and what is going on at his school.

By getting to know your teen, you will be able to recognize problems before they get out of hand.

*This is a guest post. There was no compensation. The information/suggestions provided are that of the guest poster and are not my own.

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About Kimberly

Kimberly Vetrano resides in the suburbs of New York City with her family, five cats, dog, a tank full of fish and snails. She is also a freelance writer and photographer.

Comments

  1. I think a lot of the times parents can be over protective and too controlling which often leads to teen rebellion. They need to feel like we trust them as well and that helps a lot with the attitude and rebellion.

  2. Another suggestion is to have open communicate as your child is growing. Trying to communicate openly after years of poor communication will only lead to tension.