I can’t imagine what my life would be like without having a child (or in my case children). I have always wanted to be a mom. I dreamed of having my own family way back in my early teen (‘tween) years. I always envisioned the “perfect” life with a loving husband, two wonderful children, a dog and a house with a white picket fence. I think most people have that same idealology.
I do have a loving husband, and I have two wonderful kids (when they are not driving me crazy), a dog, five cats and we live in a shoebox size condo with no picket fence. At least I am living part of my dream life.
I am grateful that I was able to conceive children, and that I have a wonderful husband/partner in my life. My heart breaks for women who are unable to conceive and women who just haven’t found the right person to have a child with. Everyone should experience the overwhelming love and joy of having a child. In a perfect world everyone who wanted a child should be able to have one with no limitations or hurdles. Sadly that is not the case.
Nina Davenport always dreamed of being a mom. Her biological clock started ticking decades ago. It went into overdrive with the birth of her niece. Sadly, being a 40-something woman with no significant partner in her life meant that time was of the essence. If she waited much longer to have a child it might be too late. As you know, the older you get the harder it is to conceive a child. Some people are lucky, like Hallie Barry who is 45. But for others the chances of conceiving are very slim once you hit your 40′s.
Nina is the youngest child in the family. Her older brothers are both married with their own families. It seems like everyone around her is having children, except Nina. Knowing that the window of opportunity was rapidly closing Nina decided to take matters into her own hands.
With the blessing of her friends and most of her family (her father was not happy about the idea), Nina embarked on months of hormones to prepare her body for conception. Her gay friend Eric offered to be the sperm donor (not without a lot of prodding). And Nina’s best friend Amy offered to be her birthing partner and be there for Nina when the baby was born.
Nina was lucky and was able to conceive on the first try. Nine months later her adorable son Jasper was born.
You would THINK it was all that easy. It wasn’t. There was a lot that went on in Nina’s life before, during and even long after the birth of her son. She had to deal with loss, her father putting her down for the choices she made in her life, her love life and a myriad of ups and downs.
Nina is a film maker who specializes in documentaries. She spent years documenting her journey into motherhood. First Comes Love is her documentary on her life before the birth of her son and beyond. You’ll be able to follow along Nina’s journey and come face to face with her family and friends and walk beside Nina through the good times and the bad times. You’ll cheer for her, you’ll want to reach into the TV and give her a hug, and you’ll want to have a few “choice words” for others. Be there when Nina learns she learns her lifelong dream of becoming a mother was about the come true. Witness the birth of her son Jasper (FYI… it’s graphic).
First Comes Love is a must see documentary that everyone who is a parent, or thinking about becoming a parent, should see. I think it’s also important for older, single women to see that it is possible to become a mom even if you don’t have a partner or if you are in your 40′s (or even 30′s). More and more women are opting to be single mothers. I salute all single mothers out there. I’m fortunate to have a wonderful husband. It’s hard enough to raise children with two parents. I can’t imagine doing it alone and having to juggle parenting, trying to have a love life and trying to maintain all your close relationships (both family and friends).
First Comes Love premieres tomorrow night (Monday, July 29, 2013) on HBO at 9:00 PM. You can learn more about the film and Nina Davenport on the HBO website and on her own personal website, www.NinaDavenport.com.
*I received a free screener copy in order to do this review. There was no compensation. The opinions expressed are my own and not influenced in any way.