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Movie Review: The Lords of Salem

 

The Lords of Salem Blu-ray

I enjoy horror movies. Not all horror movies are scary. Some of just a gore-fest. I don’t like those kind. I would rather be on the edge of my seat in anticipation for something to jump out at me on the screen instead of watching someone’s guts get splattered all over the place.

I learned about a film called The Lords of Salem, which is now available on Blu-ray/DVD. It was written and directed by Rob Zombie. If you have ever seen any of his film’s you know how bizarre they can be. He wrote the movies House of 1,000 Corpses, The Devil’s Rejects and Grindhouse.

Rob Zombie’s films are not your typical horror movies. He tends to go above and beyond and “pushes the envelope” a bit.

Check out the trailer for The Lords of Salem.


It looks weird, but some what creepy too.

I was sent a screener copy to review.

Was the film scary? No.

Was it filled with blood and gore? No, not really.

If I had to describe the film in one word I would stay “trippy”.

Trippy – Resembling or inducing the hallucinatory effect produced by taking a psychedelic drug.

This movie was wild from star to finish.

The Lords of Salem starts off in Salem, Massachuettes, years ago when they had the witch trials. Reverend Jonathan Hawthorne is seen writing in his diary (as well as narrating) about the coven of witches that perform satanic rituals in the woods around Salem. You also get to witness the coven lead by Margaret Morgan performing a ritual to resurrect Satan.

The movie then fast forwards to the present day. We meet a woman name Heidi who lives in an apartment and works at a radio station. Heidi has her hair done up on dreads and likes to dress really off beat. I would say it’s a combination of goth and punk. Her apartment décor is very unique and filled with a lot of unusual and creepy artifacts.

One night after Heidi gets off work she finds a box that was left for her in the lobby of her job. It contains a record and the only thing written on the box is The Lords of Salem. She takes the box home with her. That night her friend puts the record on the stereo to check it out. The music is very eerie sounding. Her friend Whitey suggests playing the record on their radio station and asking listeners if they like it or hate it.

Heidi is not very found on the music. The first time she listened to it she had disturbing images appear in her mind which flashbacked to the witches coven at the beginning of the film.

The Lords of Salem Witches

They play the record on the radio station which causes some female listeners to go into a trace (unbeknown to the radio station or anyone else).

Weird things start happening to Heidi. She keeps having disturbing images pop into her head and she is having horrific nightmares.

As all this is going on there is something strange about the apartment down the hall from her – apartment 5. Her crazy landlady Lacy says that no one is in apartment 5.

Heidi also gets to meet Lacy’s sisters Sonny (played by Dee Wallace of E.T. fame) and Megan. Megan is played by Patricia Quinn. If you have ever seen the Rocky Horror Picture show she played the part of Magenta. Soon the ladies start to take over Heidi’s life. They seem to keep her in a drug induced trance of some sort.

Heidi’s friend Whitey and a radio guest Francis Matthias that was there the night the played the record are concerned about Heidi’s well being. Francis even goes to Heidi’s home to talk to her about some startling information that he found out abut her bloodline, only to come face to face with Lacy and her creepy sisters.

Something evil is going on in that apartment building – but what? Lacy and he sisters are taking over Heidi’s life. Heidi keeps having horrific hallucinations and seems to be in a trance. There is also something crazy going on it apartment 5.

Is there a connection between what is happening to Heidi and the brutal witch burnings from hundreds of years ago? Why are Lacy and her sister’s taking control of her life? To find out you need to pick up a copy of The Lords of Salem, now available on Blu-ray/DVD.

Trippy… trippy… trippy.

First of all I have to forewarn you that there is a lot of nudity and some sexual situations. Apparently witches like to be naked, and let’s just say they are not attractive witches either (a lot of wrinkles and sagging skin).

There are a lot of disturbing “creatures” (for lack of a better description) throughout the film like tall, thin men (?) that have faces that look like chard burlap. There is also something in apartment 5 that looks like a Thanksgiving turkey but with a head and it walks!

Weird human/turkey-like demon.

Weird human/turkey-like demon.

Creepy faced demon?

Creepy faced demon?

I don’t think the movie was scary at all. Disturbing – YES! But scary, no. It felt like a 2 hour “acid trip” but without taking any drugs.

I got lost a few times watching the film. At times I was a bit confused at to what was happening and why.

If you are into films that are about demons, the devil, witches or just plain bizarre then you’ll like this movie. If you are looking for something that is scary or a blood fest this is not the movie for you. If you love Rob Zombie films then you’ll certainly appreciate this one.

The movie does have an official website, www.TheLordsofSalem.com and a Facebook page.

FYI… The part of Heidi is played by Rob Zombie’s real life wife, Sheri Zombie.

 

Rob and Sheri Zombie. PHOTO SOURCE: The Lords of Salem Facebook page

Rob and Sheri Zombie. PHOTO SOURCE: The Lords of Salem Facebook page

Kimberly

*I received a free screener copy in order to do this review. There was no compensation. The opinions expressed are my own and not influenced in any way.

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About Kimberly

Kimberly Vetrano resides in the suburbs of New York City with her family, five cats, dog, a tank full of fish and snails. She is also a freelance writer and photographer.

Comments

  1. Jessica Giverson says:

    The pictures of this movie look scary…I am not into scary movies at all